Influenced by Artists such as Frida Kahlo, Remedios Varo and Hilma af Klint. As well as my studies in Psychology and interest in Mysticism. My art is a reflection of both my internal and external world. Blending elements of dreams, subconscious and conscious thought to create vivid imaginary worlds and surreal self portraits that often depict elements of pain, suffering, healing and transcendence. Art is an escape from medical procedures and the anxieties of ill health. 

One Year ago, I started taking art classes in watercolour expressionism. My art teacher is also very interested in art as self-care and art as a way to open up and express ourselves. Encouraging us (the class) to find our own style and allow our emotions to flow into our work. Taking these classes online via zoom has not only improved my art but also improved my wellbeing and allowed me to find a community of art lovers.

I utilise active meditation and automatic drawing in my painting practice. Active meditation is a form of meditation where physical movement is combined with mindfulness. These practices have allowed me to slow down my thoughts. I have tried other forms of art including working with oils and felt, but nothing makes my mind quiet in the way that watercolour does. 

Watercolour Expressionism is a very unpredictable method often resulting in blooms, drips and mixing of colours on the paper. Accepting these more trivial things and working on my need for perfectionism has spilled over into other areas of my life. Art has allowed me to accept what is, instead of wishing life was different or easier. This was a major step towards healing for me and allowed me to start accepting myself as I currently am.

I often use different types of music to help quieten my mind. Although my tastes in music are eclectic, I find different tempo's of music produce different results. Meditation music or for me certain dance music quietens my mind and allows me to enter a deep level of concentration. I utilise my ability to hyperfocus, entering a deep state of active meditation.

WHY I PAINT...

In October of 2020, I had not long had my first laparoscopy and been diagnosed with endometriosis, I had so much anger deep inside, trapped in every cell of my being. In the past I would walk for miles, finding quiet in the action of marching through a forest or field. But in recent years I had developed substantial pain down my legs, hips and back, making walking more difficult. I needed a new activity to quiet my racing thoughts.

In the past I had enjoyed painting with acrylics in university. And felt painting would be a good way to connect with my emotions.  At first I didn't know what I was doing, but the simple act of swirling a brush around connected me to my body in a good way for the first time in years. Taking inspiration from fellow disabled artist Frida Kahlo, I used art as a way to communicate my pain. As my patience grew alongside my art I started to be able to unravel some of the feelings I had surrounding my health issues. It helped me to have a focus whilst going through hospital treatments and most importantly it gave me a voice. 

There have been many tears along the way. Opening my heart to my own needs was harder than ever opening it to others. It took getting really ill to properly listen to my bodies needs. Art allows me to slow down and be present in my body. Art allows me to slow down and focus on my breath. When my breathing slows and I am focused on relaxing into those gentle motions, my pain eases and my heartrate becomes steady. Over the years I have seen vast improvement in my mental wellbeing and feelings of self-worth.